JanFishler

Author ~ Happiness Coach

Resistance and Fear – Outsmarting the Beast

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If there is one thing we all need to overcome it’s resistance. I’m NOT talking about ohms– the opposition to current flow in an electrical circuit.  The type of resistance I’m talking about is the one we suffer from when we procrastinate or put off tasks that are essential to our creative or personal growth.  Of course, what we resist persists–unless we do something to change the status quo. There is always a reason for our hesitancy or reluctance.  The challenge is getting to the source of our discomfort to see what we can do to calm the beast that’s preventing us from moving forward. Sometimes, there is a good reason we refuse to change, but most of the time, it comes down to fear of the unknown and false expectations about what we perceive the future holds.

FEAR

No one likes to admit that we’re afraid, but if we look closely at our resistance, fear in any of it’s disguises is usually the source.  Anxiety, angst, dread, panic, self-judgment–what ever you call it, fear is the epicenter of our unwillingness to move forward. Here are some of the unconscious beliefs harbored by the little monster called fear. I’m not good, smart, clever enough. People will make fun of me if…There’s not enough time to…Other people are better at… You get the idea. The truth is, our subconscious programming is alive and well sabotaging our efforts and preventing us from moving forward. How it plays out in life is different for everyone.

For example, it took me years to begin writing my adoption memoir. I was so afraid that my story wasn’t compelling enough, that I wasn’t a good enough writer, that I would never find a publisher.  Then, one day, it occurred to me that I could just write the memoir for myself. I could write my story for my eyes only. Instead of putting undo pressure on myself to live up to a lofty expectation, I could write a little every day and see where it went.  I could take a writing workshop and get feedback on my work. I could fill in gaps in my knowledge by reading books about writing fiction. Eventually, I built up enough confidence to share my writing with other writers and the smartest thing I did was work with an editor. Step-by-step, I overcame resistance and self published my book.

Self publication led to book marketing and new options for resistance opened up. Book in hand, there were new fears and challenges to overcome.  But here’s the thing — knowing that resistance is inevitable makes it manageable because even thought the monster looks different, it’s always the same–fear. What if I couldn’t sell the 3,000 books I ordered? What marketing strategies among thousands would work? Would my book tour be successful?  I was afraid of failing and I was also afraid of success. My book was raw and I felt vulnerable, afraid I’d told too much of the story, afraid I was too honest. I also didn’t have a clue about book marketing and my fear of failure was very real.

THE SOLUTION

I knew I was dealing with the monster of fear who manifested as resistance and procrastination. That monster would always be lurking in the shadows. So, I decided it was time to come up with a strategy for taming the beast once and for all. Turns out, resistance is strongest when there is a lot to gain or lose, but it dissipates and practically disappears when what needs to be done is broken into a tiny task, the smaller the better. So, I started limiting my tasks. Today I will email two adoption agencies and tell them about my book. Or, today I will introduce myself and my book to one local bookstore.  One or two tasks at a time became three or four and eventually I was able to spend half the day on marketing. Eventually, I sold all 3000 books and I kept fear at bay.

That was twelve years ago. Since then I’ve encountered resistance multiple times. It’s always about some sort of fear–real or imagined. In every instance, the solution is the same: break the task down into tiny puzzle pieces and move forward one little piece at a time. The next time the dynamic duo, resistance and fear, turn up for you, take a moment to consider your options. First, ask yourself, What am I resisting? Then, identify the fear. If it’s not justified, move forward.  Finally, take one tiny action.

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Jan Fishler is the author of Searching for Jane, Finding Myself (an adoption memoir), Don’t Stop Now: Making the Most of the Rest of Your Life, Flex Your Writing Muscle (365 Writing Prompts), and  PTSD: Lessons From Vietnam. She is a motivational speaker who also teaches writing classes online. More about Jan at www.JanFishler.net.

Getting Words to Flow – 3 Steps for Letting Go of Self-Judgment

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Getting Words to Flow – 3 Steps for Letting Go of Self-Judgment

I’ve made a commitment to blog at least twice a week to provide useful information to help people who write (that’s pretty much everyone who is in business). Getting concepts and ideas out of your head in a way that lets words easily flow on to the page is something we can all benefit from. One of the stumbling blocks for many of us is self-judgment. So often, our critical or negative thoughts about ourselves (and our ability to write) sabotage our efforts before we even begin. As a result, we set ourselves up for failure. We might have an absolutely brilliant idea for an article, blog post, or short story, but a negative thought about our ability prevents us from moving forward.

Many times it’s a voice from the past—a parent who didn’t think you were as creative or smart as your sibling, or a teacher who gave an essay or book report you wrote a low mark. Over time, these comments and criticisms chip away at our self-esteem, and eventually, we replace the word can with can’t. We begin to believe our thoughts and turn them into stories and a self-fulfilling prophecy about our capabilities.

Sometimes, it’s what is not said that harms us. Because actions speak louder than words, maybe nothing was said out loud about your efforts, but when you didn’t get the attention you so rightly deserved, you got the message that what you have to offer isn’t valued. This childhood programming can affect us throughout our lives, and prevent us from doing the work we are here to do.

We are all creative beings, yet many of us let judgment by others stand in our way. Writers see this most often when they are unable to fill a blank page or are thwarted by writer’s block. But it can happen to anyone regardless of their field. Often, self-judgment is what prevents you from making the money you deserve, living the life you desire, or getting the promotion you have wanted. It can be an obstacle from attracting the love you yearn for or living the life you crave.

The question then is what to do about it? The first step is to notice any time the judgment of others creeps into your consciousness. It might appear as a negative belief or an obvious negative thought (I’m not pretty, handsome, smart, or good enough to…) or it could be an irrational justification (Brent has worked here longer and is therefore better suited for the job than I am) even when you know that thought is not true.

The next step is to take a close look at the thought, trace it back to the source, and reconsider the message. Don’t be surprised to discover that you have been a victim of someone else’s projection or their overly critical nature. The intent is not to blame, but to observe the source. If you’re familiar with the work of Byron Katie, this is when you ask yourself, “Is it true?” Most of the time it is not.

Finally, take time to rewrite your history. Sit quietly and picture what should o have been said, or how the situation could have been handled, and replay the ideal scene in your mind until you feel the appreciation and recognition you rightly deserve.

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Jan Fishler is the producer of the Path to Publication DVD series filmed at the Squaw Valley Community of Writers featuring Amy Tan, Janet Fitch, Mark Childress and other well-known authors, agents, and publishers. She is the author of Searching for Jane, Finding Myself (An Adoption Memoir) and Flex Your Writing Muscle – 365 Days of Writing Prompts. She writes articles for VietNow National Magazine and has a bi-monthly column, “Healthy Options” in The Union newspaper.

 

5 Reasons You Need to Blog

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Whether you’re an author or an entrepreneur, blogging needs to be a regular part of your life. Why, you might ask? There are several good reasons:

  1. Blogging, i.e. writing about your business, establishes you as an authority, someone people want to go to and work with. You don’t have to look too deeply into your own life to know this is true. Would you pick a doctor or dentist at random from the Yellow Pages (yes, phone books are still being printed), or from Google, or would you ask around for recommendations from family members or friends? Recently, I read a Yelp review for a hand surgeon I was referred to, but had not yet met. The reviews were so bad that I picked up the phone and cancelled my appointment! Your clients want to have faith in your ability to meet and serve their needs. Your blog can provide the wisdom, knowledge, and insight that makes them feel comfortable.
  1. Your blog is a way to let your clients (customers) and prospects know that you care about them—even if you don’t say it directly. Regularly posting useful and helpful information let’s your client know you are aware of their needs and care enough to share content that will make life easier in some way. Freely sharing your knowledge doesn’t take a lot of time, and it helps build a rapport. Going back to the doctor who received the poor Yelp rankings. One of the biggest complaints was his poor “bedside manner” and brusque attitude. Obviously, his patients didn’t feel that he cared, and as a result, they took the time to let others know about it. Helpful blog posts by this same surgeon might have made a world of difference.
  1. Content you provide via your blog can help you establish and build your mailing list. This is something every business owner needs to do. By asking visitors to subscribe to your blog (newsletter or other information), you now have permission to send them emails. Email marketing is one of the most affordable ways to promote your products and services and announce offers that are of interest to your clients. You can also use the list to send out surveys and questionnaires that will help you get more information about the needs of the people you serve.
  1. Once it’s posted, a blog is something you can share via other social media such as Twitter, Facebook, and LinkedIn. Regularly sharing content creates a win-win situation. Not only are you broadcasting helpful information, but your blog posts help you attract people who need to know about the products and services you offer.
  1. Depending on how often you blog and the quality of your content, over time, blog posts can be assembled into articles, press releases, monthly newsletters, even eBooks and sent out to your list – you know, the one that keeps gaining subscribers because you’re blogging and sharing important information. I recently did this. In 2014, I knew I was going to be working almost full-time collaborating on a book and wouldn’t have a lot of time to blog. Instead of my usually 500+ word posts, I decided to post a new writing prompt each day. Recently, I took advantage of Create Space and turned those posts into a paperback and a downloadable Kindle book. For those of you who are a fountain of knowledge, your blog posts can be an excellent opportunity to download and storehouse information that can be repurposed at a later time.

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Jan Fishler is the producer of the Path to PublicationDVD series filmed at the Squaw Valley Community of Writers featuring Amy Tan, Janet Fitch, Mark Childress and other well-known authors, agents, and publishers. She is the author of Searching for Jane, Finding Myself (An Adoption Memoir) and Flex Your Writing Muscle – 365 Days of Writing Prompts. She writes articles for VietNow National Magazine and has a bi-monthly column, “Healthy Options” in The Union newspaper.Content goes here

Social Media Begins with a Blog

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Social Media Begins with a Blog

Occasionally,  even someone like me, who loves to write, gets sidetracked by life and stops—writing, blogging, posting. I kept up with my “Healthy Options” column, published the 1st, 3rd, and 5th, Tuesdays of each month in The Union newspaper, but Entrepreneurial Jan took a break. It wasn’t intentional, but apparently, I needed time to think, and as it turns out, time to synthesize, plan, and create.

During this two month hiatus, I realized that I’d lost my focus. Sure, I kept busy–even did a few workshops and worked on some fiction,  but I wasn’t clear about where I was headed. Something was nagging at me.

That’s when all of the social media marking information I’d been devouring for the past few years, gelled. In a moment of divine clarity, I realized that building a writing platform and  a list weren’t as complicated or time consuming as I’d been led to believe. In fact, what made everything seem so difficult was my resistance to “it.” By “it” I mean everything except blogging. After all, blogging is simply writing, but it’s all the other social media stuff that was dragging me down—until in that flash of insight I realized that once it was set up, everything else could be automated and relegated to a less than 10 minutes per post.

That’s when I really love technology!

With the goals of …
1. Establishing myself as an author (Building a Platform)
2. Promoting my writing and coaching services as well as my books
3. Growing a list for my workshops

Here’s my new, improved and completely do-able social media plan:

Blog (300-500 words) at least once a week (hopefully 2-3 times) and then post links to completed posts on Twitter, my Face Book  business pages, and on LinkedIn.

That’s it. Simple and easy.

Of course, coming up with a minimum of 52 – 156 topics a year is the tricky part, but I’ve done a little online sleuthing and discovered an abundance of sites that help people come up with ideas as well as catchy headings. I’ve even come up with a way to coach others, regardless of their area of expertise, through a brainstorming process that quickly generates hundreds of topics. I know it works because I used it myself.

My goal for the rest of the year is providing information that will actually help members of my target audience—writers in general, people who have a story to tell for posterity, individuals who want to plan their novel to make writing easier and more fun as well as writers who want to learn how to jump-start their writing with prompts and other tools I’ll be sharing.

Stay tuned!

Give my ridiculously simple social media marketing plan a try and let me know how it works for you.

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Jan Fishler is the producer of the Path to Publication DVD series filmed at the Squaw Valley Community of Writers featuring Amy Tan, Janet Fitch, and other well-know authors, agents, and publishers. She is the  author of Searching for Jane, Finding Myself (An Adoption Memoir) and Flex Your Writing Muscle – 365 Days of Writing Prompts. She writes articles for VietNow National Magazine and she has a bi-monthly column, “Healthy Options” in  The Union newspaper.

Blogging – 10 Reasons it Helps Your Business

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If driving traffic to your website is your goal, then blogging needs to be part of your online marketing efforts. Blogging showcases your expertise and passion about a particular topic and is a way to send hundreds of visitors to your site.

Blogs are a great tool for telling your target market about your products and services. There are several ways blogs can help your business. Blogs:

1.      Are easy to start

Creating a blog takes less than five minutes, and posts can be added almost instantaneously. All you have to do to start a blog is go to one of the blog sites like WordPress, Google Blogger, or Typepad and sign up. Populating a blog with relevant content takes some time, but if you write about something you know and are passionate about, you should be able to write between 300 and 500 words in less than half an hour.

2.      Lead to updates

How often should you post? It depends on how much you have to say, how much time you can spend promoting your posts, and how much time your target market is willing to spend reading. Keep in mind, high posting frequency can attract new visitors and help you retain repeat visitors.

3.      Provide a platform for building credibility and establishing yourself as an expert

Clients and customers feel more confident buying from someone who is perceived as an expert. Even if you’re a relative newbie in your field, a series of well-researched posts can go a long way toward setting you ahead of your competition.

4.      Have a longer shelf life than an email blast or a newsletter

Depending upon your business, you might want to use your blog posts to show photos of your product line, instruct clients about processes and procedures, feature members of your staff, or provide health tips and other strategies. The beauty of a blog is that content is easy to record, and references will last for years to come.

5.      Allow for commentary, questions, and feedback

Once you have a following, you can turn your blog into a focus group of sorts. By asking questions or making comments and requesting feedback, you can gain valuable insight about your products and services and make your customers feel like they are an important and valuable asset.

 6.      Help build a consumer-based community

Community building means developing authentic relationships among people who have a common interest. A group of people who read your blog and support your work and efforts can be a key factor in creating a viral buzz about your products and services. This can be a very good thing.

7.      Create a permanent online record

Having an archive of what your company is thinking and the direction it is headed can be a very useful tool. It can enable you to see how far you’ve come, when the most innovative and creative processes took place, and what trends developed into worthwhile ventures.

 8.      Collect your thoughts and present them in a succinct manner

If you take the time to write an idea or thought down and then share it with others in a public forum, it’s more likely to become a reality than if you simply make a statement at a meeting or send an email around to co-workers.

9.      Provide a constant source of fresh, relevant content that search engines love

Like articles, press release, web pages, eBooks, and other content, blogs give search engines what they’re looking for. As a result, rankings go up and more people find your site, ultimately increasing sales and your bottom line.

10.  Are free or very affordable

Even in these difficult economic times, every business can afford a blog – one of the most effective tools available for growing your online presence.